I was under the impression that I had misunderstood my ex-wife when she made the suggestion that I should transfer the money that I had saved for our deceased son to her stepson.
You see, I hadn’t. In the moment that I was seated across from her and her arrogant new husband, their goals became glaringly obvious to me.
Not only was this about money, but it was also about ensuring that my son’s legacy is preserved.
During the time when the call came in, I was sitting on Evan’s bed.
There were still textbooks heaped on the desk, sketchbooks that were only halfway done, and medals from scientific fairs and math leagues hanging by the window. His room had not changed since the accident.
I whispered, “You were always ten steps ahead of me, kid,” as I ran my fingers along the edge of a framed photo that was sitting on the nightstand.
Evan’s smile, which was a combination of mischief and brightness, appeared to wink at me from behind the glass. This picture was shot right before he was accepted into Stanford University.
My smart young man. In fact, he was never even able to visit the school. Because of the drunk driver, that was guaranteed.
When the knock came, I was still seated there when it occurred.
It was Mia, who had formerly been my wife. It was earlier that she had left a message that read, “We need to talk about Evan’s fund.” Even though her tone was friendly, it was too polished and too scripted.
At this same moment, she was standing in the entranceway of my home.
Before I could give her a response, she entered the room and asked, “Am I allowed to come in?”
I indicated that I was going to the living room. You should hurry up.
As if she were the owner of the home, she sat on the edge of the couch comfortably. She started off by saying, “We know Evan had a college fund,” in a completely casual manner.
My gut was in a knot. “You shouldn’t be so serious.”
Even though her eyes were fluttering, she smiled. “Give it some thought. This money is not being put to any use. This could be of great use to Kyle.
“Kyle,” I repeat to myself. You mean the child of your new husband, right?
A dramatic sigh was sent forth by Mia. “Don’t act in such a manner. “The family of Kyle.”
Stumped, I stared at her in silence. “Evan was actually unfamiliar with Kyle. And you, too? I gave a head shake, feeling the rage growing. You abandoned Evan when he was twelve years old. I brought him up. “On my own”
She said, “We just want to talk about it,” as if I were being unreasonable. “We just want to talk about it.” We will meet for coffee the following day. I, together with you and Russell,
When I sat down on Evan’s bed that night, my heart was heavy. Considering that she had the guts to even inquire about it… My mind was just unable to comprehend it.
After she left us, I was left with no other option but to take charge. Yes, I did it. Every day, I prepared Evan’s lunch, assisted him in studying for his Advanced Placement examinations, and cheered him on at each and every soccer game. Her birthday cards were sent out. There are no presents. A simple card with her name written in a scrawled font at the bottom.
When Evan was fourteen years old, he pleaded with her and Russell to let him spend the summer with them. I was not really enthusiastic about it, but I agreed to do it. The person he was when he returned was changed. Less noisy. I am exhausted.
On a certain evening, he shared with me, “They don’t really care, Dad.” “Russell stated that he did not have duty for me. The majority of the time, I ate cereal for dinner.
Never once did I send him back.
Evan, despite this, continued to have dreams. He had a strong desire to travel, particularly to Belgium. His jokes included things like “Museums, castles, and beer monks!”
“Monks who drink beer?” It would make me giggle.
He would say, “It’s research,” with a wink in his eye. Stanford is going to adore me.
They did in fact. With a full ride, he was able to enter. When I was very proud. Following that, everything disappeared in a single night. An accident involving a car. An intoxicated motorist. And ever since then, nothing has been the same.
When I arrived at the café where we had planned to meet the following day, I was there. Russell was standing next to Mia, who was looking arrogant and impatient while she was on her phone.
I was seated across from them when I made the statement, “Let’s get this over with.”
Mia displayed her well-honed charm to the world. “We just believe that Kyle should be given a chance. He is exerting a great deal of effort.
Russell added his two cents. “As you are aware, attending college is not inexpensive. Why waste the money by allowing it to remain unused?
Keeping my voice calm, I leaned forward. “Since Evan was the one who had that money. Not yours to possess. And not Kyle’s. Not to mention that it is not Russell’s.”
There was a pause in Mia’s smile. It’s time to. Evan would have been eager to lend a hand.
“Don’t speak for my son,” I yelled at him furiously. “He was a man you hardly knew.”
Russell laughed loudly. “Don’t take this in a personal manner.”
I responded by saying, “It is a personal matter.” You allowed a young man to survive on cereal while you indulged in a steak meal. In this moment, you should not stand here pretending that you are invested in his future or in his memory.
There were people observing, but I didn’t care about it. While I stood there, I turned my attention to Mia. “You abandoned your son and wandered away. It is not possible for you to return and inquire about the things that he left behind.
Later on, I left the room.
I sat on Evan’s bed when I got back to my house, holding his picture in my hands. It’s impossible for them to comprehend, youngster. However, I am. And I am aware of the actions that were assigned to us.
When I looked up, I saw the wall. A map of Europe. Belgium was surrounded by a red circle.
My laptop was opened by me. Access was granted to Evan’s 529 account. Untouched, the fund remained in its original home. It was not for Mia’s benefit. It was not for Russell’s benefit. That was not Kyle’s fault.
It was intended for Evan. The same goes for us.
A flight to Belgium was reserved by me.
After one week had passed, I embarked on that flight with a photograph of Evan tucked inside the pocket of my jacket. I did not feel isolated, despite the fact that the seat next to me was vacant.
The journey lived up to every expectation we had. In addition to strolling through streets paved with cobblestones, I went to magnificent churches and art museums, and I even drank a beer that was created by monks in the Ardennes. The sound of Evan’s laughter could be heard in my head at every turn. Commentary from him. His nightmares continue to reverberate in my chest.
In Bruges, on the very last night, I sat by a canal that was relatively calm, watching the lights of the city dance on the water. I took forth the photograph of Evan.
“We conquered it, buddy,” I said to him. We have succeeded.
I had not experienced a feeling of my chest being so heavy for a number of months. Despite his absence, Evan was not forgotten. I honored him in the only way that allowed me to do so.
As for that, no one could ever take it away from you.